I wear plaid. I'm a blogger.

I'm so glad that even after the leaves have fallen (at least at my house) the pedals haven't.

You know what's sad? Coming home on Monday to see a business card wedged in your door for someone who does leaf removal when it is less than 24 hours after you raked the leaves.

Thursday I went to a Lasik specialist to see if I was a candidate for lasik corrective eye surgery and before I get into the nitty gritty details of cost, procedure, and how wonderful it would be to wake up and read the alarm clock, let me take you into the back rooms of this practice and inside the mind of one of the practitioners. As a part of the initial visit to see if I am even a candidate for lasik there are a series of tests that everyone must go through. The first test was being taken into a back room where a nurse (female) was about to test my vision and measure part of my eye. About to, because I spoke up and asked if I needed to take my contacts out beforehand (why would I want Lasik if I already had great vision??). She then took me to another room to take out my contacts, test my vision, and see what my prescription is. After discovering what my vision is (or isn't) she had me sit in a room and wait for the doctor to talk about questions I may have about Lasik. The d...

 It's taken a whole week to be able to talk about it, but I think it's finally time to mention that the playoffs don't matter any more. Who cares whether which big market team wins the world series?? San Fransisco knocked off the Reds, so I can't root for them, the Cardinals I can never root for, the Yankees no one cares to root for, and that leaves the Tigers (whom I love dearly, but don't follow very closely...like a second cousin or something). We took Isaiah to clinch game #2 (a.k.a. Wednesday night's loss) and then my dad and I received tickets to go to Thursday's clinch game #3 (a.k.a. The End of the Season). We had great seats for game #3--so close that I could yell at the guys in SF's bullpen and I knew they could hear me. I got into their heads, saying things like, "Hey! Which of you is going to be the first to cry when a Redleg hits a game winning homerun off of you?" (those are biting words). Then I decided to shout at SF's rig...

Needles make me squirmish. I really don't care to give blood or get shots because I just don't care for needles. It isn't anything terrific--as in, I don't pass out and grow faint looking at them--I just don't like the thought of being pricked by a needle; it isn't fun. Hoxworth calls me every couple weeks and reminds me that people are dying and that their blood bank is too low and my blood type can save lives, and every time they call I have two responses: -The first response is that I feel equal parts heroic and empowered to go save a life. -The next response I have is to ignore the call, because, well...I don't like being stuck. This leads to guilt, most assuredly, but not quite enough guilt to call them back and schedule a time. Well, a couple weeks ago they got me. I answered the phone and they talked me into saving a life by giving my blood. Those darn save-a-life speeches just have a way of getting to me I suppose. I set it up to happen during ...

Do you find yourself sneezing, sniffing, and snuffling? Do you have itchy eyes, runny nose, and scratchy throat? Then I have just the solution for you!! Go outside and start hacking away at your neighbor's unkempt yard. After a few hours of wheezing in the pollen and grass clippings, you'll be feeling right as rain! Yes folks, you too can overcome your head cold with just a few short hours in your neighbor's backyard, turning this: into this:

 Ahhh....what a nice refreshing view. Sometimes you just need to sit back and take in the beauty of creation that surrounds us. What a nice, peaceful, serene hillside to enjoy the changing color of the leaves. Sit back and take in the sights and smells. Autumn is a truly beautiful time of year. Unless of course, the reason you are there is because you ran out of gas on the side of the highway...

Every good story should start with, "It was a cold, dark, rainy Friday night..." and end with, "And that's how the midget ended up in my front yard..."

I'm really not sure which is worse: deep fried Twinkies, or deep fried vegetables. On the one hand, you are admitting the fact that this is unhealthy for you and you're saying, "What the heck, let's make that Twinkie deep fried and go ahead and clog all the arteries at once." But with the vegetables I feel like someone said, "You know guys, we are eating way to unhealthy here at the Brown County Fair, it's time we introduce veggies as a fair food. What's more healthy than veggies?" and then they dropped them in 4 gallons of boiling peanut grease. That's the Brown county fair for ya. Commonly known as the LittleStateFair.com. Katie and my first date as parents and we decided to go eat deep-fried everything (corn dogs, waffle cake, and elephant ears) and watch the tractor pull. It don't get no more romantic than that. Shoo. So there we are, watching this culturally foreign concept known as "tractor pulling" (for those of y...